Creative Signs for the Work-Hard-Party-Harder set
“Honey, will get home late tonight.” And then the volume of his voice goes down to a whisper, “Overtime.” Of course, you say, “Sure. Don’t work too hard, honey.”
When you’re as good a listener as I am, you pay very close attention to the enunciation of your spouse’s words. Did he say, overtime? Or did he just say Obeertime? Note the difference between the sounds of the consonants b and v.
Obeertime is a restaurant slash beer pub (now undergoing renovation) along Pasong Tamo St. According to my husband, they serve some of the best barbecues in town. I have to take his word for it, because I have not yet done extra work in there. Bad lighting and probably not the most conducive place for checking test papers. I am just amused by places with names like this. I appreciate the wit and the play on words. And I’m sure those who need creative excuses for post work inebriation appreciate them too.
Less than a kilometer away is a place that picks up on the theme. D’Boss. “Honey, will get home late tonight. I will go to the boss.” Again, if you’re very astute, you’ll notice that your honey used the wrong preposition. If he really had official business with his boss, he should have said, I will go with the boss. And he should pronounce the article “the” using a soft th sound, not the d sound that some Filipinos use.
And then, there is this:
“Honey, will get home late tonight. I will pass by the job site.”
Be very careful, my dear readers. Listen carefully. Your hardworking husband just might be inputting alcoholic beverages instead of encoding data.
I got this through e-mail. Unfortunately, I can't find the source of this highly amusing piece.
"THE!?"
We' ve been friends for a long time ago. We come from the same alma mother. Actually, our paths crossed one time on another. But it's only now that I gave him a second look. I realized that beauty is in the eyes. The pulpbits of my heart went fast, really fast. Cute pala siya. And then, he came over with me. He said, "I hope you don't mine. Can I get your number?" Nag-worry ako. What if he doesn't give it back? He explained naman na it's so we could keep intact daw. Sabi ko, connect me if i'm wrong but are you asking me ouch? Nabigla siya. Sagot niya, The! Aba! Parang siya pa ang galit! Persona ingrata!!! Ang kapal niya! I cried buckles of tears.
Na-guilty yata siya. Sabi niya, isipin mo na lang na this is a blessing in the sky. Irregardless daw of his feelings, we'll go ouch na rin. Now, we're so in love. Mute and epidemic na ang past. Thanks God we swallowed our fried. Kasi, I'm 33 na and I'm running our time. After 2 weeks, he plopped the question. "Will you marriage me?" I'm in a state of shocked. Kasi mantakin mo, when it rains, it's four! This is true good to be true. So siyempre, I said yes. Love is a many splendor.
Pero nung inaayos ko na ang aming kasal, everything swell to pieces. Nag-di-dinner kami noon nang biglang sa harap ng aming table, may babaeng humirit ng, "Well, well, well. Look do we have here." What the fuss! The nerd ng babaeng yon! She said they were still on. So I told her, whatever is that, cut me some slacks! I didn't want this to get our hand kaya I had to sip it in the bud. She accused me of steeling her boyfriend. Ats if! I don't want to portrait the role of the other woman. Gosh, tell me to the marines! I told her, "please, mine you own business!" Who would believe her anyway?
Dahil it's not my problem anymore but her problem anymore, tumigil na rin siya ng panggugulo. Everything is coming up daisies. I'm so happy. Even my boyfriend said liketwice. He's so supportive. Sabi niya, "Look at is this way. She's our of our lives."
Kaya advise ko sa inyo - take the risk. You can never can tell. Just burn the bridge when you get there. Life is shorts. If you make a mistake, we'll just pray for the internal and external repose of your soul. I second emotion.
FILIPINISMS: Language Felonies Pinoy Style is a category for those peculiar ways Filipinos use the English language. Here's one of them.
The Ocular Inspection
How many times have you heard this term? It's also sometimes phrased as Ocular Visit. We've heard it so many times that it has started to sound right. But, think about it - what does ocular mean? 
Ocular refers to the eye. Visit http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ocular to verify. So when your HR Coordinator says he's going to a junket er uhm ocular visit to some resort your company is considering as a venue for the summer outing, you better tell him to leave his ears, tongue, nose, and epidermis in the office. He's not going to need those. Because he's only going for an ocular visit. He can only look. He cannot smell, touch, or hear. And a taste test of the resort's cuisine would also not be possible. Because it's only an OCULAR visit.
I don't know when, where, how, or why this term started being used and how it became popular. And we don't have to maim or poke the eyes of the person who started it all. But we can stop using this rather silly term and say instead, "We, (meaning you and the cute office practicumer - another Filipinism) are going to take the day off from our boring desk jobs to visit Ragged Rock Resort to check out the place for our company outing." That means you don't have to leave your other sense organs on your desk.
And your boss will say, "Ah magoocular kayo. Wear sunblock!"
Image borrowed without permission from: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/64/Ocular_Marek%27s_disease.jpg
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